Right click

"I think I'm going to change my Myspace status," he murmurs into my right ear.

"To what?" I ask sleepily, as I move my butt further back into his crotch.

"To 'In a relationship'."

It's not possible to tell with the lights off, but I freeze. Did he just say that or has my fuckwit-addled brain finally blown a fuse and affected my hearing? I must consider my response carefully so as not to freak him out. His man-brain has obviously decided this was worth going to the trouble of actually forming words for but any slight overreaction on my part could quite easily cause them to be retracted. I consider the best path to take and make my move.

"Really?" I ask airily as I coincidentally move his hand up to cup my breast.

"Well I don't really want anyone else contacting me for dating on there right now. I only want to be seeing you. I want people to know I've got a girlfriend."

Good God, a double whammy of unexpected committment-speak. Relationship? Girlfriend? Have I mistaken a particularly butch lesbian for a bloke? I shuffle my bum back even further and feel proof that no, I definitely haven't.

"I like that idea," I say, sounding on the verge of sleep but feeling a thousand miles away from it. "I think I'll do that too then."

"Cool," he mutters, kissing my neck and causing shocks of lust to fire through my body. I turn my face towards him and we kiss.

The next day I log onto Myspace a little after 9am. Sure enough, his status reads 'In a Relationship.' It makes me smile.
I remember when asking someone to be your boyfriend/girlfriend involved a frustratingly vast amount of mixed messages, hints, subtext and confusion. Now you can simply select an item from a drop-down menu and everyone knows you're together. Welcome to the digital age.